The More We Knew
by Dummy Perception
Summary: I thought after nothingness comes nothing more. But it was the source of everything. Nothing ends not. And it was the source of the scariest things, did you know?


**_Don't know what I was thinking when I wrote this._**

**_Yeah, btw, I lost my flashdrive, and I found it again, hidden safely in one of the corners of the room._**

**_So Mr. Corner is my friend right now. (I really thought I was gonna quit writing when I've lost all my unpublished works)._**

* * *

_Do not get me wrong._

I simply feared everything. I never wanted anything more than to conquer that fear. And what's there to do than to eliminate its sources as well?

What other opportunity is greater than having the power to obliterate it all? I simply took that chance.

They got in my way. I do not have any choice other than to fight in my own way. And what comes after those whose lives have been taken? The one with most proximity of course.

It was no mistake. I appreciated her for being there for me, for "helping" me cope with fear, or so they thought. But I got scared of even being near her. Her presence overwhelmed me. Her concern for me suffocated me. Seeing that smile [as if I'm not scary enough] was much more asphyxiating than the thick layered clothing I used to wear.

Indeed, I wore a very, very thick layer of clothes. They say it's too hot for the weather in the desert. But how else should I cover myself? How else should I hide from the light, from everyone, from everything? That same question gave me an idea on what I have done eight centuries ago.

They say I'm powerful enough to obtain a spot in an elite team, and so I did. What I only understood, though, was that I was not powerful enough, because things still did find ways to scare me. Shouldn't it be like, the greater the power you have, the lesser the fear? But why was I still afraid?

_But the more we know, and the more we had, the more fears get to us._

* * *

Everytime I killed, I see fear in those faces at the last moment, but what I did not understand was that their fear couldn't even seem to go on par mine; for it's much greater. Up to the last moment they breathed, I feared them still. Even their souls floating in the air mock that fear with their light. How could dark souls shed so much light?

And the purest of souls were much worse. I could hardly stand the sight of them. I cannot cover my eyes enough to protect them from the sight of one. The thick clothes I wear cannot cover them either. What else should I do to take those lights out?

I hardly saw myself; so it must be a perfect hiding place.

They blinded me, even when they were just peeking through their host's warm bodies, which I would soon make cold. And of course I hid those inside my body, and you should have guessed how.

_It sure was effective._

But He may have noticed, for I soon found myself drained of blood and imprisoned in my own skin, literally.

I thought it would be comfortable to keep darkness for company. But those lights kept on haunting me. Memories of the outside world overflowed my mind, I could hardly stop myself from screaming. I wondered where I was. I wondered how I got here in the first place. I wondered what should happen to me. I wondered if the lights I have hidden in my body would suddenly claw their way out of me to blind me again. I wondered if I would hear one of her reprimands…

_Utter darkness; intense silence._

I thought after nothingness comes nothing more. But it was the source of everything. Nothing ends not. And it was the source of the scariest things, did you know?

Does death end everything? I kept wondering, for I cannot die, you see. Not even Death could kill me, that's why I'm still here, waiting for that which would never come.

I thought of a lot of things, over and over again. I lost track of time. I imagined until I could no longer remember what's real. I could only open and close my eyes to darkness anyway.

* * *

This happened over and over again; it has become a vicious cycle. Each time I would come up with questions, and new answers that contradict each other. And another question comes next. Don't we ask questions to make more questions? Don't we answer questions with questions?

Before I noticed, eight hundred years have passed.

_That boy will soon be like me._

_That fragment of His must soon take His role._

_That little girl will someday become like one of those I have devoured._

And that man that imprisoned me a long time ago, why? How did he manage to live through everything when I couldn't even live with myself?

What must I do with freedom from my skin after a long time? I think I shall go to that source of light that lights the darkness of night, maybe to destroy it? And then those many other lamps shall be turned off soon too.

They talk about not having any fear, for letting their minds wrapped up with such thing could only lead to madness, and madness cannot simply let them defeat me, madness itself.

But they were naïve. So naïve that they know nothing about more of those that lurk in the shadows.

Only a single detail. And they say it's not even worth looking at.

But once they knew, they might even want to condemn themselves to hell for it.

_Indeed, the more we knew, the more fears get to us._

* * *

**_Brrr. I don't know what Asura's talking about either. (cross fingers)_**

**_Questions? Guesses? Opinions? Hate? Love? The review function exists for that. :)_**


End file.
